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Overall total postings: 1671
| 2512 |
N/A |
N/A |
2008-11-10 |
13:38:01 |
| Oh, bless you, Ned as your friends/brothers feel your courage and love, or a painful mark on your arm! Anno coming and going at the same time with the greeting for others as if always reuniting (yet not being apart), Alberto breaking all limits of translation and celebration and carrying messages, and Lee whose heroic to your hearts as if he was never alone in this shooting life, only coming home. Oh, simple dreams with pointless points...how that runs in all you guys- your veins like flames. As shakespeare, as mathematics and all the time and chance in between them. Woke up after dreams of that boy as well, but of course not with the weight and air around those who knew and made him and were made by him, though Lazypeeg touched that horizon like a great painter!
The dawn this morning was to find Ned's sweet and serious message with Anno and cars, and Wales, and music, and doing his thing, and that way he met people. As always Ned held the true feeling of science with queer and honest pain/pleasure, realizations and mist. In thinking about all of you, my heart goes numb on the outside, but filled with the virtuous and faulted rages you poets in nerves give your family and strangers. The years bring more, his touch is indefinable in time. This gravity around all...and nobody knows just how it curves or how we fall, but remembrances keep coming on, it's like it's all getting closer (or deeper). Souls that empty and need compleatness, dear Anno, Lee, Alberto how you bring your loved ones "like bursts of Antiquity."
Perhaps, most likely, it would change all this coming together, but I know your kindess and expression would still be there, better yet your physical company, so I so wish you all were here with your family these and all days. And yet you are, and it's such a to be and not to be suicide in either way. Strange pain that to know that i don't know another's pain. To all you beautiful people who are missing them, can't offer anything, but listening to what's inside all of you...the music, the music, the music!
Sweet Anno, my love to yours on this earth...thank you for all their dreams, where physical touching can exist without the bodies, but just as much or more than emotional and spirit! How the race continues as those dreams will become real and of waking! |
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| 2511 |
Ned |
N/A |
2008-11-10 |
09:34:58 |
| Forgot to add my name to that last posting. |
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| 2510 |
N/A |
N/A |
2008-11-10 |
09:33:57 |
| I had a dream about Anno a couple of nights ago, on the night of november 8th I suppose. It was pretty simple and pointless - I think i was driving up to wales and met him in a gas station where he was filling up his car. It's funny, ive talked to other people about this and they have the same thing: whenever I dream of him my dream is always dominated by this feeling of unusual and unplaceable confusion. I'm always so dumbfounded when I see him to know where he's been for the past...what, 7 years!!? He always says something like "oh y'know, just doing my thing". He's always been off in America, or busy with the band, and I'm always thinking to myself "God I really MUST see more of Anno, it's been such a fucking long time - how has it gotten so long??". Then it's over and I settle into whatever I'm dreaming about, with Anno playing a role in the same way any other person might.
Never once do I realise that he's dead - which is kind of wonderful because it feels like, although I've missed seeing him for so long, there's nothing dreadfully special about his being around, and he is once again part of my every day life, just pottering around doing his stuff. There's something so wonderful about that feeling that he's simply 'around'. Then I wake up, and it always takes me a few minutes for me to work out what was unusual about my dream, and I realise, and seven years gently decend round me like a mist, and I feel the weight on my shoulders again, which gets heavier and more distant each year. But I feel happy too.
Belated love to everyone on November 8th - Bee and Billy added me to their wellwishing but I hadn't left anything myself yet.
Take care of yourselves,
xxxxxxx
PS: Lazypeeg your posting was wonderful - I don't think I even need to add that there are so many of us who sometimes, or often, feel the same way as you. |
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| 2509 |
Andrew |
N/A |
2008-11-09 |
15:11:41 |
"Lazypeeg" posted the following on the Rabbit page in the Forum, and without his permission I am copy/pasting it here as I find it so very moving, and would love others who only visit this page to read it, especially Isa and Mario:
I'll put my little rambling here, because I daren't tread on the remembrance page... It's not my place.
But, I admire, cherish and respect those three boys so much that I can't say nothing.
I discovered KjD nearly 5 years ago now, they'd already been gone two years. I was 14, and I looked upto them as adults who had lived their entire lives. I'd long to be at their age, where I could understand like them, write like them, perform like them. I longed to be able to be 15 and write such powerful, breath taking lines like "Read again my friend, watch how the words bend." I longed to be 18 almost prophesying my demise like "some tragic intervention of Gods." To be 19, writing songs like Anodyne. To be not even 21 and leaving a legacy some people achieve less than in 100 years. I'm now 19, and I have no such cavalcade of literary, or music. I spent the last 5 years trying to understand Anno. Reading words he wrote and himself read, pestering Andrew and Billy, learning his songs, trying to write like him. i'd get flak from my friends because anytime I ever produced anything, it was basically a complete rip. He has had such a profound effect on me, and he was long gone before I discovered him. He had no idea of my existence, but he'll never leave mine. On days like these, I get sad, that he can mean so much to me, but I'll never get to thank him.
I'm approaching Anno's age faster than I ever imagined. And I've lived such a shorter life than him. I've never been to India, I've never been to LA, I've never been to Milan with a supermodel, I've never had a massive impact on a teenage boy's life. But I don't feel bad, or envy him. It merely exemplifies what an astounding life he lived. And I have since resigned myself to the fact that I will never even as much as hold a candle to Anno's sublime talents and achievements. But I can fucking try. No other artist will have this much influence on my tastes ever, and it's comforting to know that I will always have a goal in life; to have an impact like Anno. Even now, he's making those African kids smile, and he left us 7 years ago now. I want to make so many people happy like he did, through his words, his smile, his music. He left something to remind everyone what an amazing person he is.
But, dear Lee and Alberto. How I sometimes fear they get left out. I learned, back to front, every single Alberto KjD song. I have been playing these songs for 5 years, which is longer than Alberto ever did, but he's still better than me? I can play it bass drum for bass drum, hi-hat for hi-hat, carbon copy, but he sounds better? Maybe I'm missing the point. Maybe I shouldn't play because I want to drum like Alberto, maybe I should play because I want to drum full stop.
I never even bothered learning the bass like Lee. He was accomplished in a way I have yet to see in a band since. Never have I seen someone de-tune their bass during a song, and it still sound amazing. He is a benchmark for all guitarists, and I've yet to meet anyone half as good as him.
So I'll have a candle-lit glass of wine, reading aloud a word or two of Anno's, and a jam to a song. And I thank you for the last seven years, because without this site, I would undoubtedly been a different person now. I am eternally grateful to everyone in Wales, London and Nairobi tonight.
..Okay, that was only meant to be a line or two.
=====
Thanks so much Lazypeeg, and if it's any consolation, I think a lot of us feel much the same... |
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| 2508 |
e-j |
ej_rosenberg@hotmail.com |
2008-11-08 |
22:50:06 |
| bee, andrew, all
am online a day late but wanted to send my thoughts & wishes on the anniversary of the loss of anno, alberto and lee.
after hearing bee speak so joyously about anno's love of "anno's journey" at the anno's africa party back in september, i have tracked down a copy of the book and am saving it for my little girl's 3rd birthday next year.
e-j Xx |
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| 2507 |
David USA |
loo_dobbs@yahoo.com |
2008-11-08 |
13:00:53 |
| Please let me begin by expressing my sincerest regrets to all of you, the family, friends, admirers to these three talented and gifted men lost far too soon to this world. That being said, I further add I had never heard of any of them, especially Anno until this morning. At times, coincidences seem too much to bear that they may mean more together as a whole or truly nothing at all. I reiterate for all who read this that I have never heard of Anno, KjD. or anything else related to his life. I am a 38 year old stay at home dad, living as I always have in a town southwest of Boston, MA USA.\r\n This morning near 1:45am I woke from a dream.\r\nHear me out for I still have the shivers.\r\n\r\nI was in a darkened bedroom. A 17\" t.v. adjacent to a queen sized bed was turned on where on the screen was a man shown chest high.\r\nI got the sense it was a music video of some sort, reminding me somewhat of Peter Gabriel\'s \" Big Time.\" The man was motionless but for the constant movement of carat sized gems (diamonds, rubies and saphires) wisping in various patterns across his mouth. Smart cut brunette/blond hair, he looked to be late 20\'s/early thirties.\r\n At this time, a very pretty blonde woman in mid/late twenties came into the room and began to clean out gems, mostly large tourquoise and diamonds, from large jewelry cases on top of dressers. She mutters something to me like,\" It\'s time to move these out.\" and then leaves the room.\r\n I then turn back to the t.v. and the gems are still moving about the mouth (always falling to the left cheek southwest) when they stop to show the man smiling. Then the words appear on screen, as if it is the end of the video :\r\n ANNO\r\n VERSA\r\n\r\nMy dreams are never so vivid. I\'ve never done hallucinatory drugs. I was so struck by this, however, upon awakening I immediately wrote the following words down that just seemed to be impressed into me at that time: Anno, Versa, Covergirl, Chelsea, Timor, East Africa, Shooting, Carjack.\r\n\r\nI couldn\'t sleep (and still haven\'t) so around 5 am I started google searching the words as I wrote them when I awoke. As I saw some of these coincidences pile up from the minimal amount of research time required, (the blonde woman looked strikingly similar to Anno\'s fiance\'...) it wasn\'t until I found that this young man of a name or talent I had ever heard of had died almost to the hour (6 hour time difference Milan to Boston..) 7 years before.\r\n\r\nI am neither intentionally trying to be cruel nor am I meaning to disrespect the living or dead. I am utterly flabberghasted and still freaked out by it. Not knowing what exactly to do, I thought maybe by relaying this to you, his family and friends, it may have some meaning more profound than it is to me.\r\n\r\nI am still asking myself \"why me?\"\r\n\r\nI really don\'t think I have anything else to offer, but by all means, you may contact me at my e-mail.\r\n\r\nAgain, my most sincere condolences to you all.\r\n \r\n\r\n |
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| 2506 |
DisasterMan |
N/A |
2008-11-08 |
12:27:04 |
| Andrew brings my mind back from Budapest to join you all on the anniversary.
Having never met Anno, Lee or Alberto but spent so much time with them in the bowels of the archive, it's a strange feeling, but one always made more moving by the honesty and open hearts on display in these pages.
Ultraviolence, remains, after all this time, on my iPod, and never fails to have the same impact. A testament in itself. |
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| 2504 |
Allira |
imagenarts@gmail.com |
2008-11-08 |
05:36:52 |
| Forever in my heart, always on my mind- you find me in my dreams sometimes...
I am blessed to have known you.
Sending my love out to all those who remember; we are eternally linked through heart strings extending to those souls, still missed so terribly. I can't believe it's been 7 years!
Best wishes to all involved with Anno's Africa- Bee, please contact me, I'd like to help! I've tried to reach you several times now...
Love always,
Allira xXx |
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| 2503 |
N/A |
N/A |
2008-11-08 |
03:22:08 |
| on a night to remember, water comes as life and words...whether in the form of an iceberg or of thick, thick mist, and something with music, carrying such precious cargo heads into it...and then the letting go, holding on to feel all of your glorious souls, breathing in their hearts. The candles sing like the road in the kicks, joy, and darkness. Here is the night, and now i fianlly abandon the bloody world to read all your amazing messages over and over -they have released tears and pain and joy from you like the molecues in water. Trying to find air and stillness and understand (impossible!) your love and ache which is deeper than the heavenly ocean surrounding all your continents. Sending so much love in your dreams to all of you, with or without bodies, "still in the wings of existence, humming along." beautiful Isa and Mario, sweet Bridget, darling Andrew, Lee's family, all Anno's siblings and relatives (everywhere they are), and Billy (great prince!)...oh, Lord! O come Landslide! The drummer on the night of his celebration and the healing that was overcoming the artist's veins and the poet's voice at the climax which never lets you down coming again, yet never leaving for all of you! These bold hearts beat on... |
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| 2502 |
David |
N/A |
2008-11-08 |
00:34:38 |
| Anno, Lee, Alberto, I sing songs with you tonight! |
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